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The more I think about how badly the Mach3 Power mulched my neck, the madder I get. I still can't believe that a single session with that vibrating egg of a razor left my neck with red marks and shave bumps three days later. How guys can shave with this thing and keep coming back for more is beyond me.

This morning I wanted a shave as far away as possible as the M3P. If the battery-powered Gillette is the future, than take me back, doo doo doo doooo, take me back. All the way back, to how man shaved in the days of yore. Before the multi-blade cartridge, before the Schick Injector, before the safety razor, before the straight razor. I wanted to tweeze each hair out one at a time with a pair of clam shells, just like the ancient Greeks used to.

Okay, that's too far back.

The farthest away I could get from the Mach3 Power this morning was to whip out the almighty Feather straight razor -- the instrument of death I swore I'd never go near again, at least until the next time I felt like futzing with it again out of curiosity. If the Mach3 Power is the razor of the masses, designed to compensate for the most extreme laziness and lack of concentration on the part of the user, the Feather straight razor is the exact opposite. Any laziness, any lack of focus, any day-dreaming while holding this scarily sharp blade to your face, you're sashimi.

I was so mad at the Mach3 Power I wanted to avoid duplicating any part of the regimen I used along with it. I went and got some different cream, Taylor's Rose, and spread some Pacific Shaving Oil on my dripping wet face and neck before brushing on the lather. I had my trusty printed copy of Dr. Chris Moss's excellent step-by-step straight razor guide resting on top of the toilet tank, opened to the relevant chapter. It was time for a fresh coat of skin.

Whether it was boning up with Dr. Chris, or the magical properties of the Rose shaving cream, or the hyper-sharp Feather Super Professional blade having been dulled just a tad from the several previous shaves I'd had with it, I can't say, but this was easily the best shave I've been able to muster from the Feather. I did one downward pass, relathered, and did my first mostly successful completely against-the-grain shave with the Feather ever. I say mostly because I did get some nicks here and there, mostly on my chin, which is the toughest area for me to shave with any straight, not just the Feather. For some reason my chin's the easiest part of the shave when I use a DE, but the hardest to master when I'm using a straight.

But even with a few nicks, the shave was very nice and not irritating in the slightest. Afterward, my entire face had that same "just got a facial" feeling that I had when I got that Straight Razor Shave To End All Shaves at Truefitt & Hill's shop in Vegas. I pretty much avoided the red marks left by the Mach3 Power, to give them some more time to heal, but the rest of my face and neck looked and felt great.

I'm going to try to stick with the Feather for awhile, to see if using this thing day in and day out will help me get over the newbie hump to where I can really start shaving with this thing as easily and confidently as I do with a DE. I know I said I was giving up on the straight after that unfortunate incident with the Dovo Shavette, but that was before the Mach3 Power kicked my ass. Now I must scrape off every trace of that experience that literally scarred me.

I saw in the news yesterday that Gillette gave shopping star David Beckham a diamond-encrusted Mach3 Power as a Father's Day publicity stunt. They say the razor's worth 50 grand. I say who's the 25W bulb in Gillette's PR dept. who chose a guy with perpetual glam-stubble as the poster boy for a shaving system? 20 bucks says those zirconias wind up on a belt buckle by Thanksgiving.