.

You know how it is. You stumble upon an amazing restaurant -- the food's incredible, the prices are cheap, the place is inexplicably empty except for a select few lucky foodies who, like you, are giggling like idiots with every bite as the waiter keeps bringing over more dessert courses on the house.

Do you tell your friends about it? Or do you clutch this jewel to your chest and keep it to yourself, so you don't have to stand in line to get a table tomorrow?

My problem is, I always blab. I can't help it. I love sharing my finds with people. I even do it for a living now.

But sometimes, I wish I hadn't opened my big fat mouth. Because what happens is, everyone and their Nanna Fanny jumps on the bandwagon and suddenly I'm standing in line and there's a two-hour wait, and now I'm wearing this stupid vibrating beeper when by all rights I should be shoveling ambrosia into my face and laughing the triumphal laugh of the selfish hedonist.

Which is my way of saying I should've kept my yap shut about Schick Injectors. Or rather, Andy should've kept his mush (Britslang) shut about his trick of using clipped Feather disposable straight razor blades in an Injector, and before him, Gordon, who started this whole thing by reminding the shavegeek forums for as long as I can remember that the Injector is, in fact, a superior safety razor to the double-edge DE, and that it not only shaves closer but causes less irritation and is easier to boot.

Now the word's out, and shavegeeks everywhere are scarfing up Injectors on eBay and driving up the prices to heretofore unheard-of heights. Hundreds of dollars for used razors from the 1970s?? What is WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!

Honestly.

So let me make this perfectly, abundantly clear:

Nevermind!

I was wrong about the Injector. So was Andy. Gordon's never wrong, but that's beside the point. We were ALL WRONG.

The Injector is actually a TERRIBLE razor. Can't shave worth a tinker's damn. Even with a Feather blade, you may as well be waving a real bird's feather on your face, because nothing's gonna get cut. And with the standard Schick blades, your whiskers actually grow longer and more coarse with every swipe of the razor. It goes against science and God, but it's true.

You see, kids, sometimes Uncle Corey gets a little too much Concord Grape in him, and he goes off half-cocked, waving his arms around and shooting his fool mouth off. Usually it's just crazy diatribes about the gummint, but sometimes Uncle Corey really goes off the deep end, and this was one of those times.

Fact is, old Schick Injectors are the worst razors you can possibly use on your face. The blade geometry's all wrong, the strange material the handles are all made of leaves warts on your fingers, and that chrome or gold plating on the part that contacts your skin? It's lead. North Korean "super lead", in fact, that's even more poisonous than a houseful of paint chips. The briefest of touches and you might as well start writing up a living will because if you don't, the gummint's gone take it all away.

The most poisonous (and, coincidentally, the worst-shaving) models of the Injector razor are the E-series razors from the 1940s, with the bakelite handles and brass shaving heads. Ouch, are they awful! I mean, just look at 'em. Lousy shavers, especially the as-new ones that hardly look used. They're the worst. Steer clear. Whole communities have been wiped out by the plague caused by just one of these razors. Injector? Ha! More like, "infector"! They'll infect you, and your whole family. Just don't even bid on them. They're like a nest of vipers.

Almost as bad are the all-alloy type F Injectors, which I haven't actually tried because they're pretty rare and by rare I mean horrible. Just horrible. You get that all-metal razor under some hot water and then bring it up to your face, you're going to sear through your flesh like a hot coal. Permanent scarring is the name of that tune -- you heard it here first. As I said, I don't have one of these yet, so if you find one, send it to me and I'll toss it into a smelter as soon as I receive it.

See, I'm just trying to help you people. I do this out of love. Like Leo Buscaglia. You're my friends, and I want you to get that perfect shave you're entitled to. You just need to know that you're not going to get it with a vintage, as-new Injector with original box with no bids 20 minutes before the end of the auction. No, especially not then.

What we all need to do is quit bidding on these Injectors. Just stop doing it, starting this minute. You won't believe how much better you'll feel the instant you stop the sinful, shameful, self-destructive cycle of bidding on and winning vintage Injectors on eBay. Some have described it as "A feeling of total joy and release, like a million orgasms, or a dozen S'mores crammed in your mouth all at once." Others tell of a brilliant white light that suffuses their entire being and radiates outward in all all directions, connecting their very soul to the cosmos. Still others report enhanced stamina, hair regrowth, and sudden financial windfall. And all from just refraining from bidding on any more vintage Injectors on eBay.

As for me, I suffered through a MISERABLY poor shave this morning. Like an idiot, I used my Injector (stupid, STUPID!) with a Feather Pro Super blade, after lathering up with my Vulfix #2235 badger brush and some Taylor's Rose shaving cream. Oy yoy yoy! What a waste of time. Not a hair was reduced, despite the fact that I cut myself up so bad I passed out from the pain. Came to in an ambulance screaming through traffic, with an IV stuck in my arm. Is that how you want to start your day?

I was horribly wrong about the Schick Injector. I only hope I'm not too late to stop the rest of you from bidding on any more of these razors on eBay. And if you've already scored an Injector or two or fourteen, I've got three magic words that will change your life:

CATCH AND RELEASE.

That's right -- you "caught" an old Injector on eBay and got your little prehistoric hunter DNA thrill, so now's the time to "release" that Injector back onto eBay with an auction of your own. I guarantee you'll sell it for more than you originally paid for it! In fact, I super double guarantee it.

Some wise investors -- the kind Uncle Sam doesn't want you to know about -- are making ten, twenty, even a hundred million dollars a week by selling old Injectors they won on eBay back on eBay. It's the latest thing that Hollywood celebrities and particularly sexy hip-hop artists are doing. I'm not saying you're as cool and attractive as they are, but hey, maybe you are! In which case, this is something you really should get moving on, as fast as you can.

And finally, let me get down on my hands, knees and chin and apologize for saying that these old Injectors are anything north of dreadful. I have a drinking problem, you see, and I need help. But that's my cross to bear. You shouldn't worry about me right now. No, you need to focus on the matter at hand.

People, stop bidding on Injectors, and dump the ones you've already scored back on eBay. Do it today.

Do it for -- the children.

I've been watching the BBC comedy "Little Britain" on DVD (a friend gave me the European PAL discs because I've got a dual-zone DVD player, but it just came out on NTSC DVD for the US and Canadian markets) and I'm in love. This has got to be the most brilliant show since "The Office". It was recommended to me by a UK playboy I met in Lapland, Sweden who's dated even more famous models and celebrities than I have, so I took him at his word and am I glad I did -- this is my new favorite show.

One of the most amazing things about LB is how uncanny Matt Lucas's female impersonations are -- he's hands down the most believable woman I've ever seen a guy do. Really, it's unbelievable.

"How does he do it?" I said as I watched the DVD with beloved wife the other day.

"He's got no facial hair -- no facial hair, no five o'clock shadow," beloved wife explained.

And she's right, as usual. We'd watched an interview with Matt and his comedy partner David Walliams, and Matt's got no hair. On his head. At all. I'm not sure if he's got alopecia or something along those lines, but the guy's completely hairless. Not even any eyebrows. He's a round, hairless comedic genius.

But it got me thinking. If a guy has no facial hair whatsoever, then by definition he's always got the perfect shave. I'm talking a perfectly pink face, without even a trace of those little black whisker dots I've always got even after the closest and most aggressive shaves. When I'm doing on-camera work I can mostly hide them with heavy makeup like most men on TV, but without makeup I have a slight shadow even right after a shave with my closest razor. So do you, probably, and it drives you nuts, right? Get over it. You're not eleven anymore.

Still, a permanent perfect shave is almost worth not having any other hair on your body. David Walliams, the other half of Little Britain, does female characters as well, but good as he is, and he's off-the-charts good, he always looks like a guy doing a gal because of his whisker dots.

On the other hand, no facial hair means never shaving. Which raises the question, do I love to shave with a badger brush, a vintage Injector, and wonderful smelling English shaving cream because it stands on its own as a pleasurable and relaxing ritual, or because it's something I have to do anyway, so I may as well take pleasure in optimizing and maximizing the experience? If I didn't have to shave, ever, would I miss it? Or would I just rub my perfectly hairless, porcelain face all day and never give another thought to silvertip badger hair or Trumper's Violet cream again?

My best of both worlds would be zone-limited alopecia -- just the areas where I shave, leaving all other bodily hair intact -- for the porcelain skin thing, but I'd pretend-shave with a brush, cream, and bladeless Injector. Hell, why not a Feather disposable blade straight razor without a blade? I could finally feel like a shaving He-Man!

Today's He-Man shave was my last with a Feather Professional blade in my Injector. This grade of blade works very well, but after a couple of shaves with it, I don't think it's really any better than the stock Schick blades, to be honest. it's excellent, but so are they, and they're cheaper and easier to find. Even Amazon sells 'em, for cheap.

I do think Feather's Professional Super blades, the El Jefe grade, are the most ungodly sharp and close-cutting blades I've ever used in my Injector, so I'm going back to them for my daily shave. I got an excellent shave today with the lesser Pro blades, but I don't want merely excellent anymore. I want ungodly. I get that routinely from the Pro Supers when they're clipped down to fit in my Injector. So that's what I'll use from now on, until Andy Samuels hunts down an even scarier blade to blow our minds with.

the weird turn Pro. Feather Pro disposable straight razor blades.

The Japanese industrial company Feather makes some of the scariest blades on the planet, and its celebrated Artist Club disposable blade straight razor is a legend among hardcore shavegeeks for sporting the very sharpest blades you can obtain for the purpose of shaving your face.

The Feather straight razor blades come in three flavors:

1. Pro Guard -- the "training wheels" Feather blade, with a wire-wrap guard that protects the skin from ever having the actual edge of the blade come in contact with it.

2. Professional -- designed to replicate the edge and feel of a standard 5/8 size traditional straight razor.

3. Professional Super -- thicker, sharper, scarier -- the most aggressive and ruthless of all the Feather blades, and the closest shave possible today from any razor.

About a month ago, Andy Samuels in the UK came up with the world's best wetshaving idea -- he took a Feather disposable straight razor blade, cut it down to the same length as a standard Schick Injector blade, and installed it in his vintage Injector razor shortly before getting the best shave he ever had.

When I read about Andy's trick on Wetshavers, I tried it myself and haven't shaved with any other razor since. However, my first attempt wasn't successful. I tried a Feather Professional blade instead of the Pro Guard Andy had used, and for some reason my 1940's E3 type Injector wouldn't shave worth a damn. It seemed like it was cutting, but even after two passes, my face felt like I hadn't shaved at all. So I swapped out the Pro for a Pro Guard blade and suddenly the magic happened. Later on I tried a Pro Super blade and that's all she wrote -- this is now my favorite razor and blade rig of any that I've ever tried.

Still, it bothered me that the Pro Guard and Pro Super blades worked wonders in my Injector but the Pro blades didn't work at all. Didn't make sense at all. The way these Feather blades load in an Injector, they're held in place so that the cutting edge is at the exact same position no matter which of the three blade types you install. So why didn't the Pro shave at all, while the Pro Guard and Pro Super cut like crazy?

It's been bugging me so much I finally decided to try the Pro blades again, only this time in a different Injector. Same E3 type, but a different example, yoinked via eBay and scrubbed/boiled (yes, shavegeek chicken littles, you can boil a bakelite handled Injector, as long as you remove the boiling water from the heat once you put the razors in to sanitize them -- I've boiled two dozen of these E-types without incident, which is something I can't say about the plastic-handled L1 now known as "Dali's Injector") till it was shiny as new.

I took a fresh Feather Pro blade and clipped it to the right size using as a guide the fake plastic Injector blade that came in a new-old-stock Lady Eversharp I bought for my ever-sharp lady, who, truth be told, still prefers her Lady Sensor. So now I have a pink long-handled Injector I can take with me if I ever do a stretch at Rahway State --

"You eyeballin' me, fish?!"

"Well, duhh, look at you, silly-- you've got shavebumps all over your face! Here, try my Injector -- "

The Feather Pro blade loaded right into the Injector perfectly, just like the first Pro I tried in my other Injector. But after lathering up with Trumper Violet shaving cream and my Vulfix #2235 brush, it was clear from the very first swipe that this time, the Pro was cutting hair like the other Feather blades.

It did feel different than the Pro Guard and Pro Super blades, though -- the thinner Pro has more give, so it's not quite as unyielding and "my way or the highway" as the Pro Guard and Pro Super. In fact, the Pro reminded me a bit of how a DE blade flexes on the contours of my face when I shave with a safety razor. The Pro is thicker and sharper than a DE blade, but it has noticeably more flex and give than the other two Feather blades.

And the shave? Much closer than a DE, but not quite as scary-close as I routinely achieve with the Pro Super blades in my various Injectors. While the Pro Super gives me a shave every bit as close and long-lasting as a straight razor's, the shave today with the Pro blade felt perfectly close but began stubbling up a few hours earlier than I've gotten used to with the Pro Super blades. I'd place the Pro's shave about midway between the best shave I ever got with a DE, and the shaves I get now with the Pro Super blade in an Injector. I haven't shaved with a standard Schick blade in my Injector lately, but I think the Pro shaves closer than those blades as well.

I still don't have a clue why the earlier Pro blade didn't shave well at all in my other Injector. Maybe the geometry was off, or the first blade was bad, who knows? What I do know is that the Feather Pro blades work great in Injectors, and offer an improved shave over the standard blades currently available for this razor. If you find the Pro Super blades too aggressive and don't want to pony up for the more expensive Pro Guards, the Feather Professional disposable straight razor blades, when clipped down to the proper length, are an excellent choice for an old Injector.

Today I shaved with the oldest razor I've ever tried -- a remarkably clean 1927 Schick B-1 "Magazine Repeating Razor", the precursor to the Schick Injector that's become my main razor.

I picked up this remarkable razor on eBay recently (mine's brass but otherwise identical to the B-1 pictured above), in a slap-happy hoarding frenzy fueled by the spectacular shaves I've been getting lately from my 40's-era bakelite-handled E3 Injector loaded with a modified Feather disposable straight razor blade. By the time I sobered up, I'd scored a couple dozen Injectors from all over this storied razor's timeline, but the B-1 Magazine Repeating Razor is the oldest and most majestic of them all.

A heavy-duty brass and steel piece of mechanical beauty that shames today's all-plastic "shaving systems", the Schick B-1 is, like all pre-1955 Injectors (the ones made before Eversharp-Schick started going for a more mundane "windshield ice scraper" look), a thing of beauty that still works as well as it ever did despite nearly a century on its odometer.

Unfortunately, "as well as it ever did" means, at least in my B-1's case, not that great. Oh, it shaves -- just not very closely. Compared with the later E-series razors, the B-1 suffers from a more primitive head geometry and a safety bar that prevents the blade from really doing much at all. I shaved with-grain and against-grain with this thing and my face felt like I hadn't shaved at all. I started over again with my E-3 Injector, my Vulfix #2235 badger brush and some Taylor's Avocado shaving cream, and got a shave so close it's nine hours later and my face feels just as uncannily smooth as it did this morning.

But the shave's not the point with the B-1. This razor is so cool it's beyond belief. The head pivots 90 degrees to line up straight with the handle, and then an internal repeating magazine mechanism auto-loads a new blade just like Schick's original inspiration for his razor's design, the Army repeating rifle. The mechanism on my B-1 looks to be in good working order, but I don't have any of the blade magazines on hand, and they don't come up on eBay very often.

Fortunately, you can pop a modern Injector blade out of its magazine and slide it right into the B-1 since it's the same size as the old blades, though as I said, the shave won't exactly shock and awe. But any modern blade will fit perfectly.

I'd love to score an old magazine, though, just to see this baby in action. It's even cooler than the Injector -- you pivot the shave head up so it lines up with the body, jack the end cap at the bottom of the handle, and the internal magazine repeater loads a new blade right into the head through a slot at the top of the handle. It's wicked cool, and I'm dying to see it in action someday if I can locate some of the old blade magazines.

The Schick B-1 Magazine Repeating Razor is an engineering marvel, an elegant example of 1920's metalcraft, and a fascinating look at the design destined to evolve into the Schick Injector. That the B-1 can't shave worth a damn is beside the point. It's by far the coolest razor I've yoinked yet.

I may have to rethink the Taylor's Lemon & Lime shaving cream. It shaved me very well two days straight, but today was one of those shaves that tells you something's wrong with your rig and you better fix it quick.

I got a few nicks, which never happens anymore, especially since I switched to the Injector. And my face finally started feeling drier and more sensitive than usual, which is what it did that first time I tried shaving with Trumper's Limes cream. Maybe I can catch a shave or two with these Trumper and Taylor citrus-scented creams, but I think regular use isn't such a good match for my particular skin.

Which sucks, I'm telling you. I really love the smell of these limey creams. They smell so fresh and delicious, and remind me of margaritas, lime sorbet, even just that lime wedge you squeeze over Baja Fresh tacos. Plus they're nice and manly -- none of that fruity-patootie rose, violet, or (ye gods) pina colada scent to throw you off your man-game. Gotta keep your edge, show 'em who's boss, eat or be eaten, and all that.

Well, I'll tell you who's boss. My hurting facial skin, that's who. And the boss says to lay off the lime shaving creams. Further, the boss says to go back to the fruity-patootie creams, specifically Taylor's Rose, if I want to keep the boss happy. Because the boss is feeling a bit raw, and needs the kind of TLC Taylor's Rose provides.

I see these guys at the gym shaving in the locker room with ungodly crap -- rusty disposables with cheap foam, etc -- and they're tough old birds. Me, I've gone soft. I let myself drop my guard and delve into this Modern Fop trip, and now my face is so sensitive it practically recites poetry.

It's my mother's fault. I got her skin. My dad can and has shaved with rock salt and a belt sander, but I have to lay off a frou-frou English shaving cream because its four parts per million of citrus oil dries my face out and makes it feel raw if I shave with it more than twice in a row.

I'm sure I'll come back to the lime creams for a shave now and then, just for a change of pace -- the smell alone is worth a shave here and there. But my skin isn't up to this stuff on a daily basis.

Tomorrow I should just put on Frankie Goes To Hollywood while I'm shaving with whatever floral cream and be done with it already. "Hit me with those laser beams.."

Yesterday I shaved with Taylor of Old Bond Street's Lemon & Lime shaving cream. Maybe this didn't make your local evening news, but it was a big deal for me. A couple of days ago, for the first time ever, I was able to shave with Trumper's Limes shaving cream without drying out my skin and leaving it feeling raw. Whether it was the Injector razor or my improved brush wrangling, suddenly I'm able to enjoy West Indian Limes, that most manly of shaving scents, without incident.

See, I've been trying to reassert my maleness, which in retrospect I clearly placed in a blind trust when I dove with a girlish squeal into the floral side of this whole wetshaving trip, specifically the rose and violet scented shaving creams and assorted poultices which awakened the Old Lady within me.

Beyond the Joseph Campbell drum circle, I had another reason to try Taylor's Lemon & Lime shaving cream. While seemingly every other Taylor varietal has its amen corner, the Lemon & Lime has long been the rarest and most elusive of all this English brand's shaving creams. While Taylor's Rose, Sandalwood, Lavender, and Avocado shaving creams get all the accolades and buzz on the shavegeek circuit, the Lemon & Lime cream goes unnoticed. Unloved, seemingly. Unyakked-about, certainly.

Why this is so, I never quite understood. Trumper's Limes cream has been a perennial wetshavers' favorite since before WWII, while even the comparatively miniscule Scottish shaving brand Castle Forbes's Lime shaving cream has a loud and opinionated cult following on the shavegeek boards. But for some reason, Taylor's Lemon & Lime cream gets no love.

Is it the Lemon part of the equation? There's a reason nobody drinks lemonade with breakfast, although for argument's sake nobody drinks limeade for breakfast either. Okay, not the best analogy. But I do wonder whether the lemon in the mix turns some guys off from trying the Taylor citrus cream.

I've had a tub of this stuff for awhile now without ever trying it, and since I had such a fine shave with Trumper's Limes cream the day before, I thought I'd try Taylor's take. I like lemon & lime sodas, after all -- 7UP, Sprite, Valu-Club Lemon-Lime, even Fresca (although not the Dew, despite its caffeine-choked charms). So I'm down with the yellow and green.

Taylor's Lemon & Lime cream has a citrusy scent, but like most of Taylor's shaving creams, there's something else going on up in there. Not sure what it is, but it's kind of smoky, in a good way. Gives it body and meat, and males it up good. No furniture polish, this. It's complicated, "like the man who wears it". Taylor does the same multi-faceted thing with its other otherwise single-note scents like Rose, Lavender, Sandalwood and Avocado -- there's always some other flavors throwing jabs and feinting around the base note, making things either more interesting or less pure, depending on your bent.

Traditionally, English shaving cream lines recommend citrus-scented creams for oily skin, as real citrus oil tends to have a drying effect on the face. Not a bad thing for an OPEC-puss like me, but some guys complain that Trumper's Limes shaving cream leaves their skin feeling dry and tight. I used to be one of them when I was shaving with a DE, but for some reason, using an Injector razor does away with this effect for me, making the Trumper Limes cream no more or less moisturizing than the brand's excellent Violet or Rose creams.

I shaved with Taylor's Lemon & Lime cream after lathering up with my brush of choice, the Vulfix #2235. Brenda Starr, my fiery orange-handled Schick Injector, held a modified Feather Pro Super disposable straight razor blade.

The Taylor Lemon & Lime cream gave a fine shave, and the scent was very nice to sniff throughout. Not as clean and purely limey as the Trumper cream, but more of a complex, almost cologne-like richness. Out-and-out lime geeks won't find it to their liking, I'm guessing, but I could smell this stuff every shave just fine.

My only quibble with the Lemon & Lime was with its lather. While the shave itself was up to Taylor's usual standard, the Lemon & Lime's lather wasn't as thick and rich as what I routinely enjoy from Taylor's Rose, Lavender, and Avocado creams. I tried using a bit more of this cream than usual but it still didn't rise up into the kind of solid, larval mound I experience with the other Taylors. Didn't seem to affect the shave any, but it was a difference worth nothing, as some shavegeeks really lean on this aspect of a shaving cream's profile as a marker of excellence.

Larval mound geeks, look elsewhere. Excellent shave and manly smell geeks, by all means add Taylor's Lemon & Lime to your SCAD list.

Today I went back to using a stock Schick blade in my Injector, as an experiment. I wanted to see if the Feather disposable straight razor blades I've been getting such amazing shaves with for the past several weeks really were so much better than the standard blades this razor takes, or whether the improvement I was seeing was simply due to becoming more adept at shaving with the Injector after using a DE for so long.

So rather than replace the expired Feather Pro Super blade in my razor with another one, I chunked in a stock Schick from a new 7-pack. It was a pleasure to simply chunk a blade into the Injector from the blade magazine instead of clipping one of the Feathers, manually inserting it into the Schick magazine, and then fiddling with the magazine and razor till the Feather slid into the Injector and locked into place. Not that I mind going through this rigmarole every week if it means world-class, straight razor quality shaves every day, but it sure is nice just chunking a Schick blade into the Injector like the good Colonel intended.

Now, I never had a problem with the stock Schick blades at all. From the very first shave, they delivered a closer and more comfortable cut than any DE rig I've ever shaved with, and the Schick blades are plenty smooth and forgiving despite the seriously close shave.

It's just that when I tried AndySam's trick of modifying a Feather disposable straight razor blade (first a Pro Guard, then a Professional Super), the shaves suddenly shot up to the moon and resembled nothing so much as a professional straight razor shave.

The thought's been nagging me that maybe I just became more comfortable with the Injector as time went on, and it wasn't really the Feather blades after all. Maybe if I put a Schick blade back in, I'd get just as good a shave as with the Feathers.

Along with the Schick-loaded Injector, I used Taylor's Lemon&Lime shaving cream with my Vulfix #2235 badger brush, and for pre-shave prep I had to sub mowing and edging my lawn (the ultimate shave?) in the hot August sun for climbing a machine to nowhere at the Y and sharing a schvitz with a naked guy who looked like Hall of Fame wide receiver James Lofton doing situps in the steam room like I did yesterday.

The all-Schick shave was nice and close -- these blades are really excellent, and sharp as the day is long. But I have to say that the Schick didn't glide quite as smoothly over my skin as the Feather Pro Super blade. And where one stroke of the Feather would've been all that was needed over a given patch of skin, the Schick needed a few extra passes to get everything.

Mainly, though, the shave itself wasn't quite as awe-inspiring as it's been with the Feather blades. It was closer than what I can achieve with any DE loaded with any blade, but now that I've been spoiled by straight razor quality shaves every day with the Feather/Injector combo, anything short of this paradigm is, I have to admit, a let-down.

I could happily live with the Schick blades and never complain about them. After shaving with a DE, the Schick blades were a revelation -- along with the Injector razor, they give me a shave that's closer, more comfortable, and far easier than anything I was ever able to get from even my best Merkur. I'll keep buying Schick blades as long as they keep making them, because they're excellent, excellent blades. Perfect for my dop kit when I travel.

That said, as long as I've got fresh Feather Pro Super blades (or the Pro Guards, which shave nearly as well) on hand, that's what I plan on using in all my Injectors. It wasn't my improved technique after all -- I don't know that you can improve your technique with an Injector. You just pick it up and shave with it. It's the most geek-free shavegeek razor I've come across yet. But when you fit a Feather disposable straight razor blade into it, that's when the magic happens.

The first mention I ever saw of the venerable British shaving company Geo. F. Trumper's "Extract of West Indian Limes" shaving cream was in the Ben Silver catalog, an upscale gentleman's clothing catalog I like to treat with the proper reverence by reading it in the bathroom.

At the time, I was shaving with a Mach3 and Aramis Lab Series Maximum Comfort shaving cream, an expensive (30-some-odd bucks a tub!) brushless cream chock full o' lidocaine, a topical numbing agent also found in the very tips of condoms with brand names like "Prolong", "All-Nite", and "Go-On-Hit-It-With-A-Hammer". I thought I knew what I was doing but of course I did not.

Nestled amidst the photos of classic menswear like Alden cordovan loafers and Ben Silver's own blazers with school crests on the buttons was a page devoted to Trumper's old-fashioned shaving products, including the aforementioned West Indian Limes scented shaving cream. The catalog even had a neat tale about how Trumper used green labels before the "Great War", but was forced to use pink labels due to rationing and then kept the pink labels once the war ended.

Years later when I got my first DE safety razor and began the switch to the good stuff, the first tube of quality English shaving cream I bought was a tube of Trumper's Extract of Limes. Partly because of the Ben Silver catalog and that story about the pink label, but mainly because when I unscrewed the store's tester tube for a sniff, the scent of limes was so startlingly wonderful that I kept sniffing and sniffing, long after it became inappropriate. I bought the tube on smell alone, though I also felt secure in the knowledge that Ben Silver, purveyor of all that is utmost when it comes to man-finery, wouldn't carry crap.

So imagine my surprise when I got it home and it felt like a step backwards. Compared to the Lab Series and Art of Shaving lavender shaving creams I compared it with, the Trumper Limes cream dried my face out when I shaved with it, and left it feeling more raw than the others. Smelled amazing, but the shave seemed harder to bear, not nicer as I'd expected it to be.

Now, to be fair, I didn't really know what I was doing at this point. I used way more cream than I needed, and I hadn't yet learned how to properly soak a badger brush with hot water and mix it with the cream properly to make effective shaving lather. I just took a dry brush, squeezed some cream onto the tips, and mashed it around on my face till it covered it with an icing-like coating. Brilliant.

Still, I tried other creams and got much better results. Subbing Coate's Lime cream gave me better lather and no rawness, and then Coate's Lavender was even better, and then I was off and running with Taylor creams and the Trumper florals like Rose and Violet. Trumper's Lime fell to the back of the lineup and never really got back into the batting order, until today.

See, I've been kind of second-guessing my wholesale leap into the floral category of wetshaving products. It's one thing to embrace your feminine side, but maybe I've been hugging it a little too tight for a little too long. Discovering that I actually liked the smell of roses and violets after encountering them in excellent-smelling Trumper and Taylor shaving creams and colognes sent me on a sort of "Floral Pride Parade" this Spring. Which was lovely. Really, it was. And whenever I'd find myself wearing a pink polo and some violet cologne after shaving with rose cream with my pinky in the air as I bandied the razor about, I'd think, how secure I must be my pitcherness that I can wear all this catchery!

And yet...

So today I decided I needed some manly smells back in my rotation. And since I've always had this nagging feeling that I never really gave Trumper's Limes its due, I decided to call it off the bench and give it another chance, only this time with more experience and better tools under my belt.

I also got in about ten minutes in the steam room at the Y today, after my workout and before a shower. The steam room is my new best friend. Not only is it relaxing, but it's a killer shaving prep. Ten mins in the steam room and I'm soaking wet and pink from the heat. I'd take my dop kit and shave in there in a heartbeat, but the Y has up a sign on the door, "No Shaving in the Steam Room", so I guess I'm not the first guy to notice how steam and shaving go together like Shields and Yarnell.

Standing at the locker room sink I squeezed off some Trumper's lime into my palm and beat it into lather with a Vulfix #2234 badger brush. The smell of limes was phenomenal -- what on Earth smells better than real limes?! The scent triggered all kinds of smell and taste memories -- margaritas, gin and tonics, tequila shots, key lime pie, Green River soda, those green Manischewitz "fruit slices" candies you eat at Passover two at a time at Hour Three when nobody's looking.

And the shave, with a vintage Injector loaded with a fresh Feather Pro Super disposable straight razor blade, was just as phenomenal for its comfort as it was for its closeness. I didn't feel a trace of the drying effect or irritation I did when I first tried this stuff quite awhile ago, and after slapping on some of Trumper's Limes Skin Food for the full-on West Indian Limes effect, my face felt and smelt amazing.

I am so happy about this I can't begin to tell you. Because I love this Trumper Limes shaving cream, and I've avoided it for so long because I thought my skin didn't take too well to it. I'm so glad that's not the case, because Trumper's Limes may be the classic traditional English shaving cream, and I've always wanted to be able to use it on a regular basis. Now that I know what I'm doing, I can and will, most definitely. Enough with the girlie scents already. It's bad enough I cried during "Finding Nemo". I'm back with the limes, baby!

Since I started using a modified Feather disposable straight razor blade in my old Schick Injector razor, I've wondered how long these super blades would last when used as a safety razor blade rather than a straight razor blade.

Back when I was trying these scary-sharp blades in Feather's Artist Club straight razor, I gave up before the blades did, so I have no idea how long they typically last before they start catching on your skin and you need to replace them.

I've read differing accounts on the shavegeek forums, with some guys claiming several weeks of daily shaving with the Feather straight razor blades (Feather's DE blades, designed for DE safety razors, typically last me a little over a week before they give up the ghost). But the Feather straight razor blades are a whole different kettle of fish -- thicker, sharper, and with a different edge geometry meant to mimic a traditional cut throat razor's. So far there's no data on how long these things last in an Injector, because until AndySam came up with the idea on Wetshavers, nobody had tried it before.

Well, now a few of us are shaving with this incredible rig. I finally got to the end of a Feather blade in my Injector, and I can tell you that the Pro Super blade I've been shaving with every day officially went South after eight days. I got amazing shaves with it for a solid seven, and then the eighth shave served unmistakable notice that it was time to change the blade.

I got a nick. Okay, several nicks. I never get nicks anymore, especially now that I've been using the Injector -- you really have to be slashing like a madman to nick yourself with this safest of safety razors. But I got some nicks. Nothing serious, but I had to haul out the alum block just the same.

Also, the shave itself was noticeably rougher, especially on my underchin. This is always a sign that I'm shaving on borrowed time with a blade. This is the shaving equivalent of driving with the needle below empty. How much farther can I go before the tank is really empty? A mile?

So the verdict is in. You get a week with these Feathers in an Injector. You might squeeze another day or two out of these guys, but from now on, just to be safe, I'll be resuming my pleasant Monday morning ritual of changing the blade in my razor, whether it's a Merkur in my DE or a clipped Feather disposable straight razor blade in my Injector. Just like I always fill 'er up when my tank's still a quarter full. As wonderful as these Feathers are in the Injector, they turn on you plenty quick when they're overdue.

I'm officially done yoinking vintage Injectors on eBay.

I do this every time I find something old that kicks ass -- I go just a little nuts, rounding up backups for the object of my desire, then backups for the backups, then different colored backups, then backups for the different colored backups, until I've got several dozen of said object when I really only need one.

I've got a drawer full of vintage Gillette adjustable DE razors I hoarded once I tried this razor and fell in love with it. I still do -- not only is a great shaver, but it's probably the single coolest razor of them all. So naturally I had to score two or three dozen of them -- hey, you never know, and they haven't made these for decades. Maybe I'll put the kids through Harvard when I sell these at Sotheby's another decade from now. I saw that Metallica documentary where Lars sold off his entire art collection for 20mil, and it was all crap. I figure three dozen clean Gillette adjustables ought to bring in a nice, sweet haul.

And now I've gone and done it with Injectors. I won my first one on eBay a few weeks ago, and it gave me such an amazing shave, even with stock Schick blades, that I started buying up every decent Injector I could find, on eBay, in antique stores, anywhere.

Before I knew it, I was awash in Schicks, Eversharps, and a bunch of really zany unusable razors that came in some lots of razors I had to bid on to get at the Injectors. Any masochists out there want an old Gem razor that takes box-cutter blades? How 'bout a rusty Flicker that still has, I kid you not, vintage pubes crusted to the blade? Maybe it was Marilyn Monroe's, or Bea Arthur's? Any "Maude" fans out there? Make me an offer!

I cleaned up these old Injectors the best I could -- first I gave 'em a serious scrubbing with a Radius toothbrush and liberal amounts of Bartender's Friend (no, not a sawed-off under the bar, but rather, the abrasive cleanser), and then I boiled the bejesus out of 'em for half an hour or so till they were cleaner than the day they shaved their first puss.

I'm telling you, these old Eversharps with the bakelite handles and gold-plated brass heads are tough little buggers! You can boil the hell out of them and they come out looking perfect -- the later 70s and 80s Injectors with the plastic handles can't go near boiling water or they melt (I learned this the hard way, sorta melting the handle on one of these:


-- it still shaves perfectly fine, but it looks a little Dali-esque now -- say, didn't Dali date Bea Arthur at one point? Anyone want a matched set? They're priced to move!)

One thing I've noticed about these bakelite Eversharps is that even though they all look exactly alike, some shave a lot better than others. Eyeballing the safety bar and the razor gap, they all look nuts on, yet some of the bakelites don't seem to get all the whiskers while others shave like a dream no matter what blade you feed them. It's not that some of these dogs won't hunt -- the worst Eversharp I've got can still give a decent shave, but the best ones in my stable are truly God's razors, capable of straight razor quality shaves with embarrassingly little effort.

Today I picked the best Eversharp of the litter -- a saucy, orange-handled number I named "Brenda Starr", and fed it a new Feather Pro Super blade I'd clipped down to size. I lathered up with Taylor's rose cream and a Vulfix #2235 badger brush, and proceeded to get the very closest and most amazing shave I've given myself to date. Honestly, it was stupefying. I even back off a lot on the downward pressure, because these scary-sharp Feather blades are at their most terrifying when brand spanking new, but damned if I didn't get the best shave I've ever give myself.

It felt just like that mythical straight razor shave I got at Truefitt & Hill's (Dovo Shavette with a Personna blade, Pacific Shaving Oil, T&H hot lather from a Campbell Lather-King, lotsa hot towels and painstaking skin stretching by the master barber who wielded the blade, and T&H aftershave balm to finish), except my neck wasn't red with irritation afterward.

I kept stroking my face all day, faceturbating right in front of my wife, kids, and my mother-in-law, because I couldn't quite believe how close my shave was. I'm rubbing my face right now, ten hours later, and it still feels freshly shaven (Shaved? Shuven?). Amazing.

But that's it. No more eBay Injectors. After the auctions I'm already watching are done, I mean. Starting..........now. Oh, there's an adjustable and I don't have one of those yet. Okay, starting......now!

Wait! Some guy misspelled schick, injector, razor, and the words "no" and "reserve". Art, is that you? Okay, last one and then that's it.

I am officially out of the Injector bidding game, starting.........

The other day someone asked my why I got into traditional old-school wetshaving -- what spurred me to get proactive about hunting down the right tools and technique.

I had to think on it for awhile, but then I realized that it was when I first began getting interviewed on TV that I became really proactive about getting a great shave.

Even before I saw what my face looked like under hard studio lighting and the unforgiving eye of the television camera, I can remember always being unhappy with my shaving and feeling that somehow it should be a lot better in terms of appearance, feel, and comfort. But when I started working in TV and saw myself up close on the monitor, with that bluish shadow even though I was caked with enough makeup to choke a goat and had just shaved only an hour or so before, I'll admit it -- I became obsessed with shaving.

It's been a long haul of many years. I tried fancy shaving soaps, what I thought were fancy shaving creams, and all sorts of pre-shave oils and assorted accessories like aftermarket handles for the Mach3 blade cartridges because a "heavier handle makes all the difference, blah blah woof woof...", but none of it really improved the appearance of my shaves.

When I discovered to my delight that the old-school DE safety razor was not only much easier to shave with than I'd ever thought possible, but vastly better at leaving my face baby's-butt smooth and looking/feeling great all day, I was beside myself. And sure enough, when I saw myself on camera for the first time after I started shaving with the DE, I no longer saw any beard shadow under the makeup, or the little red marks on my neck I used to routinely get from the multi-blade razors.

Now I shave with an old Injector, loaded with a Feather disposable straight razor blade cut down to size. And the shaves I get from this rig are incomparable. But even though I've been raving about this setup for a week or so, I didn't really appreciate the jump in quality my shaves took when I switched to this razor until today, when I did my first on-camera work since switching to the Injector.

Usually I need a fair amount of makeup to smooth my complexion out, hide whatever visible beard remains even after a recent shave (my face isn't one of those that looks perfectly hairless after a shave -- I'd kill for that kind of face, but right after I shave, you can still see the black ends of the hairs on my skin. It's not a shadow, per se, but it isn't invisible either), and kill the glare off my oily skin. And no matter what makeup artist I work with, they always have to double up on the spackle where I shave, even when I used a DE. It's not just me -- most men I know on TV have to deal with this, and some even more than I do.

But today I was surprised and pleased to see that for the first time, I didn't need any extra makeup to hide my shave areas -- in fact, I needed less makeup than I've ever been given by a makeup artist to look camera-ready. The Feather/Injector shaves me so close now that I get a straight razor quality shave every day, and the accumulative effect seems to have improved things to such a degree that I don't need as much makeup anymore when I appear on-camera.

I look at my wedding photos and wish I'd known about the Injector, and badger brushes, and Taylor's rose shaving cream back then. I look at photos of me holding our baby daughter in the hospital and wish I'd known how to shave properly at the time. In these photos I look like me, only more of a bum. My five o'clock shadow jumps off the photo and makes me wince every time I see a picture of myself pre-wetshaving. Yes, it's that sick.

The Age of Enlightenment in the 18th century ushered in a new era of rationality, ethics, aesthetics, and knowledge in an attempt to lead society toward progress after the irrationality, superstition, and tyranny of the Dark Ages.

Sound familiar?

I think ShaveMyFace is entering its own age of enlightenment as we speak. I'm heartened by the unmistakable signs of renewal now that its most tyrannical member has left to start his own site and taken some of the more regressive members with him.

Understandably, some of SMF's more codependent shavegeeks are having a difficult time right now, without a know-nothing bully constantly telling them how to think and what to buy. But like the palace guards in the Wizard of Oz who suddenly came to their senses and became good guys again once the Wicked Witch was gone, even the most reflexively hostile shavegeeks are starting to -- dare I say it? -- think for themselves. It's a great thing to see.

I'm very impressed by how Vince, the administrator of ShaveMyFace, stood up to the attempted coup last week of the site he created, and how he dealt with the shameful theft of the all of the forum's threads and member registrations by the unsuccessful coup plotter.

I've long respected Vince as one of the good eggs on SMF, and I wish him all the best as he tries to re-establish the site as a positive, friendly, gentlemanly place for shaving enthusiasts and newbies alike to share knowledge, discuss products and techniques, and enjoy the company of those who share their love of traditional wetshaving. Having such an obnoxious, ignominious member define the overall tone of his forum for so long must have been very frustrating for Vince, but now that he doesn't have to deal with that kind of nonsense anymore, he can look forward to a much more positive era for SMF.

As of this writing, there are three major shavegeek sites -- ShaveMyFace, Wetshavers, and StraightRazorPlace, for devotees of, respectively, safety razors, the Mach3 Power, and straight razors. Of the three, it is ShaveMyFace which has the most members, the most activity, and the greatest chance to be the most intelligent and progressive site for traditional wetshaving hobbyists on the Web.

Now that SMF has turned a corner and put its recent unpleasantness behind it, I feel very strongly that it has a much brighter future than I could've possibly imagined only a week and a day ago.

Okay, on to today's shave. I got one of the very best shaves yet from my Injector loaded with a modified Feather Pro Super disposable straight razor shave. I'm finding that even though the very first shave with this combo was extraordinary, it keep getting better as I learn how to optimize the shave with this unique razor. A Vulfix #2243 brush and Taylor's avocado shaving cream rounded out the rig.

One new thing I tried today was a sample of D. R. Harris's Aftershave Milk at the end of the shave. Excellent stuff! I've been extremely happy with Trumper's Skin Food as my post-shave poultice of choice, and I like a few others too like Proraso's liquid cream aftershave balm, but my face loved the Aftershave Milk. It didn't leave my skin greasy, and my face felt great all day. The Harris has a very light and pleasant scent that mostly disappears pretty quickly, but every now and then I'd catch a whiff and enjoy the echo. I'll definitely be buying a bottle of this very shortly -- highly recommended.

I hate to be the one to break it to seventy-five or so of you guys, but you've been suckered.

Simply put, those $120 "custom, hand-turned, hand-lacquered, exotic Cocobola wood, genuine silvertip badger, made in Germany" ShaveMyFace forum brushes aren't any of those things.

In fact, they appear to be low-end, mass-produced, poorly-finished, Chinese-made, and filled with mid-grade "fine" or "best" badger, not the top-grade silvertip which was promised to you.

What's more, the untied bundles of bristles are simply glued into the handles like other inexpensive, mass-produced brushes, instead of being hand-knotted first for durability and longevity as with a truly handmade brush. That's why some of you have noticed that your brushes are losing more hairs with each use than your Vulfix or Kent. Expect to lose more.

And the kid who rooked you in with the nice story about the German brushmaker who made the best shaving brushes at any price and would be happy to tool up to handcraft whatever custom brush design some tiny online shavegeek forum "voted" on?

As the first wave of brushes hit your doorsteps, the kid fled, ran, high-tailed it. Now his membership has been terminated and he's been banned from posting on the site, which makes this the third shaving site in a row that he's been kicked out of for bad behavior.

The "hand-rubbed nitrocellulose lacquer" appears to be AWOL as well -- several new owners of the SMF brush have reported that its "lacquer" has already begun to flake and peel off the brush, after only a week. Real nitrocellulose lacquer doesn't do this, and certainly not after only a week's worth of getting it wet.

Speaking of getting it wet, one gentleman who claims to be using and storing his SMF brush in the shower will certainly see its poorly-finished wooden handle split sooner rather than later, which will be rather educational, since then he'll be able to see the handle's cross-section and determine if it's really solid wood or not.

What it probably isn't is genuine Cocobola. This exotic wood is rare and expensive, which is why the original hand-crafted shaving brush whose design was stolen for the knockoff sells for $550. Because that's what a custom, hand-turned, hand-finished, Cocobola wood shaving brush actually costs. It can't be (and wasn't) done for $120. Not a chance. The SMF brush may look like the real deal, but all the evidence points to a mass-produced, low-end Chinese knockoff. Which would, ironically, make it an incredible ripoff for $120 instead of the deal-of-a-lifetime as was promised.

Here's what I believe really happened:

1. Because of a longtime feud with Ray DuPont of Classic Shaving (yet another instance where the kid was banned, this time as a customer), he decided to start going out of his way to promote vendors and products which compete with Classic Shaving. Hence his over-the-top rave for the German company's shaving brushes, which Ray doesn't sell.

2. Taking the hurt-Ray game even further, the kid began talking up the idea of a custom ShaveMyFace brush exclusive to forum members only, and claimed to have the German company's agreement to custom make whatever brush design the forum members voted on.

3. After many weeks of plodding debate, the brushmaker tells the kid, "Look, enough is enough -- here's the design we'll make for you guys, and we'll stick an engraved medallion on the base so it'll look really custom."

4. The kid suddenly announces to the voters that he's "discovered" an even better looking design than what they'd all agreed to, and lays it on thick about how this will be the greatest brush of all time, and the greatest price for a genuine silvertip brush they'll ever witness. The vote is discarded and everyone falls into line behind the "winning" design.

5. The brushes are mass-produced in China, shipped to Germany, and then reshipped to the US.

6. Despite heartfelt denials, the kid makes money off every brush he's able to get a SMF forum member to buy. This explains why he was so adamant that all the orders go through him. After all, if you're getting a cut, you need to know how many orders there are.

I'm genuinely sorry that all this went down. A lot of guys who were saving up for their first really top-class brush were cheated and lied to.

But can I just say something here? I honestly couldn't believe that you guys -- grown men, most of you -- would fall for such an obvious scam. In fact, I even made a prediction that this whole thing would end badly. I knew something smelled rotten about this whole scheme as I watched it take shape, and that the price of the brush and the claimed attributes just didn't add up.

Something was very wrong with all of this. And I wasn't the only one who sensed it. Many of the more experienced and knowledgeable wetshavers on the forum declined to join the herd in ordering the forum brush, and they shared their suspicions with me. All of us feel bad that so many guys got cheated out of their $120.

As for those of you who bought the brush, and keep telling yourselves you love the brush, and turn a blind eye to what the kid did, I think it's great that you choose to make me the focus of your confused and misplaced rage. After all, I'm the one who told eight million people around the world how cool your hobby is, and turned many of you on to wetshaving in the first place. What a prick I must be! If only I had lied to you and sold you a bill of goods on a cheap Chinese brush by promising you it was a hand-made custom German genuine silvertip exotic wood handled greatest brush there will ever be. We could've made beautiful music together.

Above all, keep incessantly posting that you love your brush, that it hasn't shed a single bristle or lacquer chip, and that somehow its mid-grade "fine" badger hair and lack of a proper bristle knot endow the SMF brush with a magical water-holding and lathering ability that beats Vulfix and Kent brushes which have much higher quality bristles and are constructed to a vastly higher standard. We believe you. Really, we do.

I knew the SMF brush fiasco would end badly, and it has. In fact, it's even worse than I'd suspected. Everything about this brush is a lie, including the "brotherhood" and "community" that the kid kept crowing it was supposed to symbolize. It's only fitting that as soon as the brush showed up, he ran away.

Okay, got to end this on a positive note. Today I tried shaving with my Feather/Injector rig while using only a thin layer of Nioxin hair conditioner as both shaving cream and aftershave balm, without taking a shower or going to the Y for a sweaty workout first. I just woke up, washed my face with hot water, and went to town. My cheeks and chin felt fine, but my underchin and neck got a bit banged up and are still sore.

Now are you happy?

Ever since Andy Samuels first wrote about his experiment with putting a modified Feather disposable straight razor blade in his Schick Injector razor, a handful of shavegeeks have tried this trick with varying degrees of success. I had terrible luck with a Feather Professional blade in my Type E3 Injector, but amazing results with Feather's Pro Guard and Pro Super blades. Chris Moss tried a Professional in his E3 and got a great shave. Other guys have gotten great shaves with certain combos of Injectors and Feathers, while others tried it and got lousy shaves.

Clearly, the tolerances of these old Injectors is all over the map. I lucked out with the first Injector I bought on eBay, because it shaves like a dream whether you feed it standard Schick blades or the scary-sharp Feathers. But other Injectors I've won on eBay since have been all over the map --- some are obviously bent out of shape, while some are subtly off in certain ways that really matter when it comes time to put blade to face. You can eyeball these old razors all you want, but in the end, you have to load a blade and put razor to face to determine if it's a winner or not. Of the seven Injectors of varying vintage I've scored so far, I'd say two E3s are keepers. Which makes them considerably more expensive than the $5 I paid for them, but when you consider that the $120 Merkur Vision DE, a very fine razor indeed, can't shave me as closely and comfortably as these old Injectors, whatever I paid for them was a bargain twice over.

No, I'm not talking about the ShaveMyFace forum brush, that obvious scam which is now unraveling before its owners' very eyes. I'll address that sorry episode in due time -- if you're one of the unfortunates who bought one of these brushes and the "lacquer" is beginning to flake off after just a week's worth of use, I feel for you, kid, I really do. We'll clear this whole thing up soon, and then you can dust yourself off, chalk the whole thing up to momentary loss of cabin pressure, and get yourself a real shaving brush (more on this later).

Actually, the little shaving brush that could is my dad's brush. Back when I first got caught up in all this old-school wetshaving crap, I admit I went a little "born again" on all my male friends and relations, trying to get them into it as well. My dad, bless him, humored me by buying some of the gewgaws I was panting about. I gave him some Taylor's and Musgo Real shaving cream, and a Merkur long-handled DE razor with a pack of Merkur Platinum blades. He said he already had a brush -- "something I picked up locally (Dallas) at some shaving shop at the mall".

I figured he'd found an Art Of Shaving store and bought himself a decent "pure" or even "fine" badger brush, nothing fancy, just a $40 or so brush to schmear some cream on his puss. When he told me how much he liked the fancy shaving creams I gave him, and how they really improved his shaves and made him enjoy the ritual for the first time in his life, I figured wow, we really, um, connected.

Then I visited my folks this weekend and saw his brush for the first time...

I'd run out to the drugstore to pick up some diapers for my little guy (Huggies Supremes #5) and of course I perused the local Dallas CVS's shaving aisle, why I don't know since I had several months' worth of Injector blades and assorted poultices in my dop kit. I can't help it.

I spied a cake of Williams shaving soap on the bottom shelf and threw it in my cart. I love this stuff! It's kick-ass shaving soap, works as well as any hard soap I've tried, smells great ("yummy lemon verbena scent" as the good doctor describes it), and couldn't be cheaper -- $2 in Dallas and a buck-fitty most other places. I figured the old man would put it to good use, him having a nice brush and all.

When I got back to my parents' house and gave it to him, I said I'd show him how to build a lather with a hard shaving soap. "Lemme see your brush and I'll show you how it's done," I told my dad, who proceeded to reach into a drawer and pull out what looked like a miniature model of a real shaving brush. Seriously, it looked like a 1/5th scale model of this brush. I don't know who made it or where he got it -- the details of his story were sketchy -- but it was reeeeally small. The knot couldn't have been more than 10mm. Seriously. If you think the little Vulfix travel brush is weensy, it's got as 20mm knot. My dad's brush would be positively dwarfed by the Vulfix. Who makes a shaving brush this puny?!

I told him as soon as I got home, I'd send him a real brush. I've got an extra Vulfix #377 at home and it'll be Dad's brush ASAP. How can you let your father shave with a brush that should by all rights be applying eye shadow?

Shaving on vacation for me has always been a mixture of excitement and d'oh!-factor. Excitement because I'm trying to pull off a precision grooming move in a strange bathroom with weird light and unpredictable conditions -- D'oh! because invariably I either forget some crucial part of the rig, or the parts I bring don't work out for whatever reason.

For awhile now, my travel dop kit has carried pretty much the same rig -- Merkur HD razor, a tube of Taylor's lavender shaving cream, the peewee Vulfix travel brush without its container tube, and a mess of no-name Israeli Personna blades I got on eBay, figuring that if airport security ever took my blades at an inspection, I'd only be out 15 cents a blade. Never mind that I think nothing of buying $14 worth of dried papaya spears at the airport gift shop -- if I'm going to surrender some DE blades, they better be cheap as hell.

This trip, however, I overhauled my entire travel shaving rig. Out went the Merkur DE, the weensy Vulfix brush, and the tube of Taylor's lavender. In their place went my newfound friend the Eversharp Schick Injector loaded with a Feather Pro Super blade, a pack of Schick Injector blades, a Simpson Chubby #1 best badger brush, and a tube of Taylor's rose shaving cream.

The razor swap I did because the Feather/Injector has become my new daily shaver. The Taylor swap was simply due to wanting the same rose cream on the road that I shave with so often at home.

The brush is a longer story. Yeesh. Okay, here we go. I bought one of these $155 shaving brushes back when I first got serious about wetshaving, because a few self-described gurus on the Net had said that Simpsons were the best possible brush you could buy at any price. So rather than screw around, I bought a Chubby #1 which, believe it or not, is one of the least expensive in the Simpsons line.

Except that when I started using this expensive (to me) brush, it didn't really do anything better than the $40 Art of Shaving brush I'd been using for years. In fact, some things it did worse than the cheaper brush. And when I bought a $90 Vulfix #377 from Ray at Classic Shaving and it utterly mopped the floor with the more expensive Simpson, I threw the Chubby into my shaving crap drawer and never looked back.

Still, it's been gnawing at me that I have this $155 brush just sitting around doing nothing. So I figured what the hell, I may as well use it as my travel brush. It's small enough, and it doesn't outright suck, so why not use it on the road at least, so I'll feel better about things? So I did.

But here's the thing. The $155 Simpsons brush isn't as good as the $55 Vulfix travel brush. Not even close. With the Vulfix, I can turn a quarter-sized dollup of Taylor's rose into enough thick, rich lather to last 5 or 6 passes easy. But the Simpson brush, with the same dollup, is good for maybe 2 passes at the most before I either have to manually squeeze the brush until some usable lather oozes up out of the bristles, or I have to add some more cream to the brush. Seriously, after the second lathering, the Simpson brush is spent. It was a major error on my part to swap out the little Vulfix brush which has always served me incredibly well for this overpriced Simpson brush. When I get back home, the first thing I'm going to do is put it up on eBay, and return the little Vulfix to its rightful place in my dop kit. Then, and only then, will I have the perfect shaving kit for the road.

I returned to the Merkur HD safety razor this morning, after a week of amazing, straight razor-like shaves from a vintage Injector loaded with a modified Feather Pro Super disposable straight razor blade.

See, I'd packed my Injector, the only one I've got, in my suitcase for an early flight today. So when I woke up at the crack of dawn and remembered my new favorite razor was packed away, I reached for my old friend Merkur to revisit what it was like to shave back in the bygone days of a week ago.

Lathered up with Taylor's rose and a Vulfix #2235 brush, and loaded a fresh Merkur Platinum blade in the HD for good measure. Shaving with the HD was like going home again -- there's a reason I came back to this "lowly" DE after trying so many other, more expensive and elaborate razors. It just feels right in my hand, and shaves as good or better than any other DE I've tried, including Merkur's most expensive models.

It's more fun shaving with a DE. This type of razor requires much more mental focus and care than an Injector does, so you're more immersed in the experience and a bit of tunnel-vision comes into play. You can't daydream about sex, or food, or sex food while you're shaving with a DE. You have to watch what you're doing and be careful every for each and every stroke if you don't want even the mildest DE to give you a nasty nick.

Shaving with the HD was more pleasurable and stimulating than when I use the Injector. My brain was more fully engaged, and it had the effect of waking me up -- by the end of the shave I felt like I'd had a cup of coffee. A DE shave'll do that to you.

But the quality of the shave was not as high as it's been this past week with the Injector. My face felt smooth and there was no irritation, but it didn't feel as unearthly smooth as when I use the Injector. And my stubble returned many hourse earlier at the end of the day than I've grown accustomed to since trying the Feather/Injector rig.

The shave today was as good as any shave I've ever gotten from the Merkur. It's still my favorite DE of them all. If I'd never tried an Injector, it would still be the best shave I could possibly give myself, barring a Krazy Kat-style brick to the head and resultant newfound ability to shave with a straight razor. Because that's what it would take for me to get over my psychological hump, I'm afraid. No, the DE would have remained my razor of choice for the foreseeable future -- if I hadn't tried the Injector.

I'll keep my three (I'm not a shavegeek, not a shavegeek, not a shavegeek) Merkur HDs, and whip 'em out every now and then for a change of pace. They still shave miles ahead of any modern multi-blade razor, and they're the most fun of all the safety razors I own.

But when it comes to daily shaving, I'm sticking with the Injector. Especially after going back to the HD for a shave, it's clear that the vintage Injector is on a whole other level when it comes to closeness and drop-dead ease of use. That it delivers a true straight razor shave with the modified Feather Pro Super and Pro Guard blades (but not the Professionals, for reasons due most probably to blade thickness and possibly some sort of voodoo) makes the Injector irresistable my new razor of choice.

Since I've been writing about my recent epiphany that the Injector razor can actually deliver an ever better quality shave than the classic double-edge DE razor preferred by 4 out of 5 shavegeeks, I can't tell you how many distinguished gentlemen of wetshaving letters have come out of the closet to privately email me about their secret preference for the Injector, and how it's been burning like a secret bonfire within their savage breast lo these many years of DE loyalty.

"Of course you found that the Injector is easier to use and gives a closer shave," said one well-known online presence on the shavegeek forums. "I figured this out back in the '70s, but I've been using a DE because the blades are easier to find."

"The Injector is a better design than the double-edge razor, both in terms of the razor itself and the blades, which are thicker and more like a straight razor than a DE," said another well-known wetshaving expert.

"I tried an Injector back in the '60s and I knew instantly that this razor was better than a DE," said one of the most well-known online vendors of wetshaving gear.

So why have all these guys kept mum about their favorite safety razor, and let the rest of us build a cult around the humble Gillette DE and its Merkurian offspring?

Two reasons. First, aside from a onesie-twosie here and there, there's only been one company making Injector razors -- Schick. And when they quit making them, that was that. So you couldn't and still can't buy aftermarket Injector razors and fancy handles and all the assorted gew-gawry that you can for the DE. If you can't score an old Schick from somewhere, you're out of luck. No Injector for you!

DE razors, on the other hand, were made by dozens of companies over the last hundred years, and they continue to be manufactured in large numbers to this day by companies like Merkur and even Wilkinson, who still crank out plastic safety razors for the DE faithful and anyone else too smart to fall for the multi-blade trip.

But most importantly, Injector blades aren't as easy to come by in many parts of the world as DE blades, which themselves are a unicorn-like rarity compared to Mach3, Quattro, and Sensor blades. Buying them online is as easy as clicking over to Amazon.com, but most men simply buy whatever their local drugstore or grocery store carries, and most don't carry Injector blades and haven't for quite awhile.

So the Injector faded from the wetshaving scene, and though a few diehard fans like Gordon (eminence grise of the Wetshavers forums past and present) have kept talking them up on the forums, the vast majority of shavegeeks have focused on the classic Gillette and the more recent Merkur DEs as the savior razior.

But now that a few guys have been trying the Injector and marveling at how incredibly well it shaves, and how much easier it is to master than a DE or especially the straight razor, whose quality of shave the Injector more closely mimics, suddenly the Injector is back in the spotlight and shavegeeks are beginning to consider that maybe, just maybe, the DE isn't the end-all be-all of wetshaving nirvana.

Listen, I love the DE. My Merkur HD, and the vintage Gillettes I've scored off eBay, are a pleasure to shave with. I've developed my technique over time, and I can get a fantastic shave with any of these world-class razors. They're leagues above a Mach3 in terms of shave quality, pleasure, and just plain coolness. If I could shave with nothing else, I'd be ecstatic. Give me an HD, some Taylor's rose shaving cream, and whatever Vulfix brush you choose I don't care what size it is, and I can get a superbly close shave with no irritation whatsoever.

But give me an Injector -- especially one loaded with a modified Feather Professional Super disposable straight razor blade that's been cut down to fit the razor -- and not only will my shave be much easier to do, but the shave will be noticeably closer while still remaining free of irritation. And the stubble will stay away for hours longer than a DE shave, just like it does with a good straight razor shave.

Yes, the Injector is definitely making a comeback. A razor this good can't stay a secret forever. I'm even hearing rumblings from some quarters that reissues are in the works -- several companies are making noise about bringing back the classic Injector and relaunching a newly manufactured version so that wetshavers who feel funny about trolling eBay for some dead guy's razor can buy a brand new model that shaves just as well as the vintage Injectors. Schick never stopped making the blades, and now that AndySam (blessed by thy name) figured out that you can use Feather disposable straight razor blades in any Injector if you clip them down to the right size, it looks like you'll be able to feed new blades into your Injector for many years to come.

Today I used my 1940s Feather/Injector rig with Proraso shaving cream in the green tube, a Vulfix brush, and some Proraso liquid aftershave balm to finish things off. Ho hum. Another day, another perfect shave. Close as a straight razor, easy as using an electric while you're half-asleep and spooning Wheaties into your pie-hole at the breakfast table. The best of both worlds.

I can't wait to see what happens with the Injector in the coming year. It's possible that in a few months' time, we'll see some newly manufactured Injectors on the market, which would be a godsend. And there's even some talk that Feather might begin producing a genuine Injector blade based on its disposable straight razor blades, so you could just jack them into your Injector like a regular blade without having to clip the current Feather blades down to the right size. I'm happy to keep clipping the Professional Super blades for the time being, but it would be excellent to simply buy an Injector magazine clip of proper-sized blades and just jack 'em into my razor like I can with the stock Schick blades.

It's all very exciting, but the question remains: now that the Injector and its longtime devotees are coming out of the closet (credit where credit's due : Gordon's been proudly "out" for quite some time, and in fact he's the one who "turned" me, girlfriend), can the shavegeek community peaceably accept those of us who choose to live an alternative shavestyle?

I don't really have anything to add that I didn't cover yesterday. I shaved with the Injector loaded with a modified Feather Pro Super disposable straight razor blade again, and got yet another genuine straight razor shave without bothering with a straight razor.

Yes, He-Men of StraightRazorPlace, I said "bother". See, I'm not like you. I can't shave with a straight razor. Not very well, anyway. I can bring one up to my face and I can sweat my ass off dragging it across my skin, but a half hour later my face is bleeding, I'm still stubbly, and it takes days for the scars to heal. I've put in the time, and tried my best, but I just can't shave as well with a straight as I can with a safety razor. Someday, when the kids are bigger and I can devote more mental focus to it, I promise I'll give it another go. I really want to master this most manly of all shaving implements. But for now, I'm a safety razor man.

But that doesn't mean I can't get a shave as good as you guys. With a Feather disposable straight razor blade in an Injector razor, my shaves have elevated to a level beyond what I can achieve with the best DE razors and the best DE blades.

Up till now, the very best and closest shave I ever got was at the hands of a master barber at the Truefitt & Hill shop in Vegas. It was so eerily close that my director, who'd also gotten a shave along with me, and I sat around the rest of the day rubbing our faces and marveling at how they hadn't felt so smooth since we were little kids (although we both had a fair amount of skin irritation and red marks). I've come close to this paradigm with my Merkur HD razor, but even on my best day, the stubble returns a few hours earlier than it did that day I got the straight razor shave at T&H.

But now that I'm shaving with the Feather/Injector rig, my best day is every day. And the shaves I've been getting are every bit as close and long-lasting as that T&H barbershop shave, except with no irritation whatsoever. I'm not getting any stubble till I climb into bed late at night, and the entire waking day my face looks and feels like I just got finished shaving. It's pretty amazing, and wonderful, and I sort of can't believe what's going on here. It's too good to be true.

It strikes me that the Feather/Injector combo is really a Straight Razor For Dummies. Somehow, the planets aligned over the UK and our fellow wetshaver-in-arms AndySam figured out that if you clipped the end off a Feather disposable straight razor blade, it would fit perfectly in an old Injector razor. In one fell swoop, he combined the sharpest shaving blade available to consumers and the easiest-to-shave-with safety razor of them all, for a shaving combo that truly is the best of both worlds. The shave of a straight razor but with the no-brainer ease of the Injector.

I'm sure that the He-Men are snorting about this, and I don't blame them. There's a lot to be said for putting in the hours learning how to successfully shave with a straight razor. It's a hell of an achievement. My hat's off to anyone who can do it well.

I freely admit that it takes no skill whatsoever to shave with the Feather/Injector rig. Even though the blade is so much sharper than the stock Schick blades, it doesn't really seem to make the Injector any more difficult or aggressive. I'm shaving with this thing exactly as quickly and carelessly as I was when I was using the Schick blades, but now it leaves a virgin path of pink skin in its wake, and it doesn't feel a bit different in my hand or on my face. It's really freaky how nothing seems different but of course everything is.

I never dreamed a straight razor quality shave could be so fast, easy, and cheap ($10 eBay razor, 50-cent blades that can last several weeks before they begin tugging). If this is what it means to be a shavedummy, then I are one.

Lately I've been experimenting with modifying the Japanese company Feather's disposable straight razor blades to fit into my 1940s Injector razor, an excellent idea I got from fellow wetshaver Andy Samuel (AndySam on the shavegeek boards). When I read about his discovery that these scary-sharp Feather blades work wonders in old Injector razors, I tried it for myself and have been happily shaving with a Feather/Injector rig ever since. It's the first safety razor I've experienced that really delivers a shave on a par with a professional straight razor shave like you'd get from a master barber. And it's even easier than using a regular DE. Sure, you have to dick around a bit with cutting the Feather blades down a bit so they fit into the Injector, but the reward is a shave the likes of which you've probably never experienced unless you've ever had a straight razor shave. After I finish with this setup, my face feels like it did when I was twelve.

The Feather blades are designed to fit into Feather's Artist Club disposable blade straight razor, which looks like a traditional cut throat but takes these blades instead of having a permanent blade you need to hone, strop, and otherwise maintain like some demented village smithy all the time. Honestly, I don't know how those He-Men at straightrazorplace do it. I've had living animals that required less maintenance than a straight razor. Anyway, the beauty of the Feather straight is that you never have to worry about maintaining the blade -- when it starts to pull on your skin during a shave, you toss it and load a fresh Feather blade in its place. And even the most hair-shirted He-Men concede that these Feather blades are sharper than any hone job they can do on any conventional straight they own.

The disposable straight razor blades come in three grades -- Pro Guard, Professional, and Professional Super. The Pro Guard is the entry-level "beginner's" blade, owing to its polymer wrap on the blade which keeps the cutting edge just slightly off the plane of your skin, so it'll cut whiskers but avoid nicks and cuts. Up a level are the Professional blades, which are designed to mimic the feel and cut of a conventional 4/8 or 5/8 size straight razor, and then at the top of the heap are the Professional Super blades, the thickest and sharpest of the trio. These top-of-the-line blades are designed with more aggression, to cut the toughest beards.

Back when I was an idiot and thinking I was man enough to handle a straight razor, I tried the Feather Artist Club razor with all three versions of the Feather disposable blade. The Pro Guard let me get away with a lot of sloppy handiwork, and shaved extremely well, though I could only shave with the grain, never against it. Going against the grain was difficult and painful, not nearly as easy as with a DE razor.

As for shaving with the "unguarded" Professional and Professional Super blades, well, let's just say the less said the better. I cut myself willy nilly with these ungodly sharp blades, and they beat me up so badly I scurried back to my DE, tail between my legs.

Honestly, I just didn't have the skill to shave with such surgically sharp blades against my skin. Maybe when I give up the coffee and get on the Vicodin I'll have a steady enough hand and nerve to pick up the Feather Artist Club razor again. Since that day, the Feather razor and blades have sat in my shaving crap drawer, a memorial to my cowardice.

But that was before Andy hipped me to this excellent idea of using the Feather blades in an Injector razor. Huzzah, I thought! I can finally put those Feathers to some use. All's you got to do is clip a few millimeters off one end to size it down to Injector size, and then it's a simple matter of loading the blade into a standard Injector blade magazine and then injecting it into your razor. Really, if you're already familiar with the whole Injector trip, it's easy as pie. And if you're not, it's dead simple to grok.

A few days ago I did what Andy did and tried the Pro Guard blade, and it floored me -- easily the best shave I've gotten from this Injector. I thought the standard Schick Injector blades gave good shave, but the Feather Pro Guard was a revelation. Andy really knocked one out of the park with this excellent idea.

But why stop there? So today, I tried shaving with......a Professional Super blade!

Yeah, that's right -- I said the Professional Super. The sharpest, scariest Feather blade of them all. The Top Dog. The Big Man. El Jefe. ESPN 8, "The Ocho".

I admit, I was a little scared when I first raised blade to face today. I was in the locker room at my Y, getting ready to shave after a workout and a shower, so all the pieces were in place for a perfect shave. There was even an old guy a few sinks down, shaving with a disposable razor and a can of Edge. So I couldn't cry like a woman when the Professional Super blade cut me like a stuck pig. I had to be a man.

So I raised the Injector to the bottom of my sideburn and guided it down my cheek with the lightest, airiest, barely-there touch possible. Hmm, not bad! I could just feel the blade on my skin, but it cleaned a nice path of face right down to the pink.

So I did another pass. And another. Each time putting as little pressure as possible on the Injector as it skimmed over my face. I remembered how ungodly sharp and unforgiving that Pro Super blade was in the Feather straight razor, so fast strokes and cavalier shaving were out. But much to my surprise, I didn't get a single nick or even a patch of irritated skin. The Injector barely felt like it was shaving anything, yet every time I did a pass it left nothing but pink.

Rinsed, relathered (Taylor's avocado today, with a Vulfix #2234 brush), and took a deep breath. I've never been able to shave against the grain with the Feather disposable straight razor, with any of the three blade versions. Even Feather's DE blades aren't as nice shaving against-grain as the Merkurs and Personnas I have better luck with. So before I shaved against-grain with the Feather-loaded Injector, I paused, made sure I was focused, and went very, very slowly...

Wow! What was I worried about? In the Injector, the Feather Pro Super swims upstream without any of the difficulties I faced when using this same blade in the Feather straight razor. I did a complete upward pass, relathered, and then did yet another pass, diagonally this time, on my neck and underchin, to really get them tushy-smooth.

I exhaled a huge sigh of relief as I rinsed with cold water at the end. It was so not a big deal shaving with this sharpest-of-sharpy-sharp Feather blades in the Injector. In fact, it was glorious and easy and wonderful. The shave I got was just unbelievable -- as close or closer than the fabled barbershop straight razor shave, but without a hint of irritation. I slapped some Trumper Lime Skin Food on my face and neck and they tingled like I'd just peeled off an old face and was breaking in a virgin one. I've had facials at high-end spas by large Eastern European women that didn't feel this good.

There's nowhere to go from here. The Pro Super is Feather's best blade (that I know of -- Feather's main bread and wasabi is medical blade manufacturing, everything from scalpels to those tiny super-sharp blades that cut a flap in your cornea for lasik surgery, so the company might make even ungodlier blades which happen to fit in an Injector with a bit of modification), and I don't know of any other manufacturer making consumer shaving blades, DE or otherwise, which come within shouting distance of the Feather's extreme, almost cruel sharpness.

Likewise the Injector. This was the last of the Mohicans for me -- the only traditional type razor I hadn't tried until very recently. I've become adept at the DE -- I've tried (oh LORD how I've tried) to master the straight razor -- and now I've finally rounded the bases and become familiar with the Injector. That's all of them (those medieval looking olde-timey GEM single-edge razors that take box-cutter blades don't count --- no way I'm letting one near my puss).

Is this really it? Is the Injector, loaded with a trimmed-to-size Feather Pro Super disposable straight razor blade, really the end of the line for extreme wetshaving? Um, I was actually planning on getting to this point years from now, long after I'd turned ShaveBlog into a live sex site and cashed out to a Tuscan villa outside Colle di Val D'Elsa close enough to stroll down to Arnolfo every day for lunch and a Di Nobili at my table on the terrace.

Well, if this is the end of the line, so be it. I'm always open to new ideas, but ye gods, this Feather Pro Super/olde-timey Injector rig is some kind of miracle. Easy as a DE but shaves as close as a straight. Phineas J. AndySam, you're a genius!

I've always believed that, for the most part, good wetshaving tools stand on their own. That a good shaving cream is a good shaving cream, no matter what razor or brush you use it with. And so on and so and forth.

But things like razors, creams and brushes may be more dependent on each other than I thought. Today I tried Cremo Cream's brushless shaving cream with my Injector razor (still loaded with a shortened Feather Pro Guard disposable straight razor blade). And even though I've gotten sensational shaves with these two products used in other setups, they didn't much care for each other when used together.

I've praised Cremo Cream before -- suffice it to say, it's one of the slickest and most effective shaving creams, brush or no brush, I've tested. Amazing stuff, and extremely mild on the skin. If it didn't smell like a pitcher of pina coladas, it'd be all I ever used.

I figured the combination of Cremo Cream and this new Injector razor/Feather blade rig that's been blowing my mind for the past few days would be a giant killer. The most lubricating shaving cream on the planet with the closest-shaving safety razor in existence just had to be something special.

And yet it wasn't. This razor/blade which shaved so incredibly well with Taylor's rose and Trumper's violet creams the past few days just didn't shave or feel nearly as good against my face with the Cremo Cream. I had to go over the same areas a few times to really get all the stubble, and afterward the shave just wasn't as breathtakingly close and comfortable as it was with the Taylor and Trumper creams.

Closest I can tell, the Feather-fed Injector likes a nice, thick bed of lather to ski on -- the English creams, the Taylor especially, seemed to buffer and cushion the blade more, and all it took was one steady swipe to leave a virgin swath of perfectly smooth skin in its wake. With the Cremo Cream, the Injector felt like it was skimming the surface more. The shave wasn't as close as it has been the past few days, and I'm feeling more stubble at this time in the late evening than I've come to expect from the Feather/Injector duo.

It's all very odd, because when I shave with a DE razor like my trusty Merkur HD, the Cremo shaves gloriously -- as well or better than the Taylor and Trumper creams, especially when I use the Cremo with my badger brush. I don't get that skimming-over-the-surface sensation at all with my DE. But I do with the Injector. Why a slicker cream should prove less effective with an Injector than it does with a DE escapes me, but it does seem to explain the muted reaction a fellow wetshaver had after using Cremo with his Injector -- now that I've tried it with my Injector, I understand why he was less enthusiastic about this unique shaving cream than I was after I'd been using it so successfully with my Merkur DE.

Maybe different creams and soaps favor certain kinds of shaving tools over others. I've noticed that most of the He-Men on straightrazorplace who shave with straights tend to prefer hard shaving soaps versus creams. I've tried shaving soaps from Art of Shaving, Creed, Taylor, Trumper, Classic Shaving, and QED, but as someone who primarily uses safety razors, I get much better shaves with creams. I find that hard shaving soaps all tend to make a thinner lather that's less "cushiony" and protective than a cream's. But what works less well for me and my DE seems to be the cat's pajamas for the He-Men and their straight razors.

Synergy plays a bigger part in this wetshaving trip than I thought. I'll continue to use Cremo Cream with my DE razor, because it shaves like a demon with the right kind of razor. But when I'm using my Injector, at least when it's loaded with a modified Feather Pro Guard blade, I'll stick with my favorite English creams -- they clearly yin the Injector's yang to a T.

Tonight beloved wife took me to see the Funk Brothers in concert at B.B. King's. We loved the recent documentary about them, "Standing In The Shadows Of Motown", and I've been a big fan of these musicians ever since I first heard all the Motown hits they played on.

True, only three genuine Funk Brothers were onstage tonight -- bassist Bob Babbitt, drummer Uriel Jones, and guitarist Eddie Willis -- and the one I most wanted to see, guitarist Joe Messina, had been listed on the poster but wasn't on the show. But that's not what bothered me about the show.

It was their shaves. They all had lousy shaves.

Is it asking too much for the Funk Brothers to employ proper grooming before they come onstage to play "My Girl", "I Heard It Through The Grapevine", and "What Becomes Of A Broken Heart"? They obviously care enough about their stagecraft to all wear matching royal blue blazers (double-breasted, 'natch, for that Ted Knight in "Caddyshack" touch of class) -- so why don't these guys care about their shave?

I'll tell you why. Because they don't have what I have. They don't have a WWII-era Eversharp Injector loaded with a modified Feather Pro Guard blade, the poor dears. If they did, the footlights would've been blinding as they bounced off the Funk Brothers' freshly shorn mugs. It would've been glorious to behold.

As it was, the music sounded good (although someone tell the backup singer/MC that a keyboardist isn't "on ORGAN Y'ALL!" when he's playing organ sounds on a Roland synth), but how could I enjoy it when the shaves were not up to the same level of precision and expertise? I don't just attend musical concerts for the music, I like to see well-shaved men onstage. Now Nelson -- those two young men had splendid shaves. Truly a pleasure to take in their performance. The Funk Brothers could learn a thing or two from these sons of Ricky Nelson who found their calling in albino metal-lite power balladry.

Today I shaved with my Feather-loaded Injector again, on a bed of schnozz-happy Trumper violet cream stoked with a Vulfix #2235 brush. My little guy came into the bathroom to watch me shave -- the first time he's ever done this -- so I picked him up and sat him down on the toilet seat lid, and explained what I was doing every step of the way. Cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon, etc.

Got choked up at the end, but not because of the emotion -- because of the shave. It was another stupendous straight-razor-like shave from the Feather/Injector rig, and I didn't even have to do any special prep beforehand like sweat my ass off at the Y or rub hair conditioner over my face in the shower before the shave. The Feather-loaded Injector just doesn't care about what you bring to the party -- all it needs from you are whiskers, the ability to simply guide it down your face and then up your face, and a light, almost cavalier touch. Cover these minimal bases and the shave's a lock. It's really extraordinary what loading a Feather Pro Guard blade into a vintage Injector can do in terms of delivering an A-game shave without any special prep or technique.

Next time the Funk Brothers come to town, I'm bringing master barber Mike Vozzelli with me to treat these legends to a real barbershop straight razor shave before the show. Maybe Babbitt can teach me the bass part from "Scorpio" while Mike's putting hot towels on Eddie Willis's face. And then I'll give Mike the high sign and he'll "drop" his razor and cut Eddie's hand open -- just a flesh wound, nothing serious -- but he won't be able to play the gig that night, and they'll turn to me and ask me if I know how to play their songs, which I don't really, but how hard is it anyway to do chank-chank downstrokes on the beat, I mean it's not like I'm filling in for Mathew Nelson on "(Can't Live Without Your) Love And Affection" or anything, so I grab Eddie's custom semi-hollow Telecaster (which I keep afterward as payment for saving the show) and an hour later I'm an honorary Funk Brother, finally stepping out of the shadows to claim credit for the classic Motown Sound. All thanks to shaving.

There is a fellow in England named Andy, and he is a genius.

A few days ago, Andy posted some comments on the Wetshavers discussion board about an experiment he tried with his Schick Injector razor. Seems Andy also shaves with a Feather disposable blade straight razor, and he noticed that the Feather Pro Guard blades that go with this razor were exactly the same size as standard Injector blades, only a few millimeters longer. So he snipped a Feather blade down to size, loaded it into his Injector, and got "the mother of all shaves".

I was so juiced by his idea that I tried it myself, but for some strange reason it didn't work at all for me. Which really threw me, because I'd even taken things a bit further and tried putting an even sharper Feather Professional blade in my Injector -- unlike the "training wheel" Pro Guard blades which have plastic guards wrapped around the blade to prevent nicks and cuts, the next-step-up Professional blades are designed to mimic a "naked" straight razor blade, with no protection at all. But try as I might, I just couldn't get this combo to cut any whiskers. It was like I hadn't even loaded a blade into my razor.

After emailing Andy and tossing ideas back and forth, it was clear neither one of us had a clue why the Professional blade didn't work in my Injector. So I figured what the hell, I've got some Pro Guard blades, I may as well duplicate his experiment down to the same blade just for grins. Why not?

That's what I shaved with today, and let me tell you something man and boy, I got the very best shave I've gotten from the Injector so far. I thought this razor shaved like a dream with a stock Schick blade, but wait till you try one of these Injectors with a modified Feather Pro Guard blade. If you think Feather's super-sharp Feather Platinum DE blades make a big difference compared with Merkur/Wilkinson/Personna blades when used in a DE razor, you won't believe the transformative power of the Feather Pro Guard disposable straight razor blades have over the Schick Injector. It's a whole new ball game.

For starters, the shave seems frictionless -- the blade just glides over your face like you'd already shaved it and there's no more stubble to cut. You feel a stock Injector blade cutting, but you don't feel the Feather blade at all. You just slide it over your face and it leaves a virgin swath of skin behind.

But the really amazing thing is that for the first time ever, I've been able to achieve the same incredible closeness from just one downward pass of a safety razor as I have from a straight razor. I'm no expert with a cut throat by any means, but I can shave my cheeks with one and get really, really close with just that one downward pass. No DE razor, not even the mad-dog Merkur Slant Bar, can duplicate that feat. Neither can the Injector loaded with a Schick blade. But put a Feather Pro Guard in it, and the Injector can give you that same closeness on the first pass that could stand on its own as a damned good shave.

And here's the best part: unlike a straight razor, the Feather-loaded Injector loves shaving uphill. Loves it. If anything, the against-grain pass was even easier than the first pass, probably because there was so little stubble left to mow. Try that with a straight razor and the blade will skip on your skin like it's playing hopscotch, leaving a little trail of red dots behind it. But the Feather/Injector cuts against the grain like it's on greased skids, even on my neck and underchin, which are the hardest areas to shave like this.

I did nothing special for this shave -- just showered first and then lathered as usual with some Taylor's rose shaving cream and a Vulfix #2235 brush. I didn't even hit the Y today, so shave-enhancing sweat wasn't part of the equation. To be honest, I wasn't really expecting much from the Pro Guard blade, because of the MIA shave I got with the Feather Professional blade. I was just trying the Pro Guard blade so I could tell Andy in my next email that I tried doing it just like he had so why didn't it work for my Injector? Except it did, with a vengeance.

Honestly, it was one of the very best shaves I've ever had. It was on a par with a straight razor shave except it was far, far easier to do. My face had exactly the same exfoliated tingling, and total lack of feelable stubble anywhere on my face and neck, that I've only experienced after a professional straight razor shave.

I don't know why the entry-level Feather Pro Guard blade works so incredibly well in the Injector while the superior Feather Professional blade falls flat. I'm going to experiment some more with the Pro and even the top-shelf Professional Super blade, to see if maybe I just didn't have the Pro loaded properly when I tried it the first time. But for now, I'm going to enjoy the astounding, no-brainer shaves with this Feather/Injector rig and try not to question it, lest I jinx it somehow. This is just too good to mess with right now. I just want to enjoy it for awhile before I whip out my lab coat again.

Andy, my hat's off to you. While entire shavegeek forums generate nothing but methane, you single-handedly lit a rocket under the Injector and launched it to the moon. It's very likely that nobody has ever gotten as good a shave with any Injector as you got when you first stuck a Feather blade in yours.

Forget pastes and oils and cubes and fake "custom" silvertip brushes that are really made in China -- none of these improves the shave beyond the basic tools, if you're really being honest with yourself. But if you want to vastly improve the quality of your shaves, and you're currently using using a DE or an Injector razor, you owe it to yourself to try this idea. Simply put, the Feather Pro Guard blade, when clipped down to stock Injector blade size and inserted properly, transforms a great safety razor into something else entirely -- a bona-fide straight razor with a safety razor's handle and greater ease of use.

Way to go, Andy!

Today I brought my little guy with me to the Y and let him play in the daycare facility while I worked out. He had a doctor's appointment in exactly one hour, so dawdling was out, as was pausing for a sip of water at the water fountain before or after the workout ("You can have a sip of water when you're DEAD!" I heard my high school coach Mr. Ditolla who's probably now a greeter at a Walmart and still underqualified screaming) (Look, the guy took my JVC boombox from the locker room and kept it -- took it home and treated it evermore as his own -- just because I was playing Zeppelin on it after practice and he decided it was too loud for a locker room full of high school boys yelling at the top of their lungs to "Living Loving Maid") (You know, I thought I'd gotten over it, but then all this came pouring out) (You're an APE, Ditolla! What aisle are BOOMBOXES in, old man?) (OK now I'm over it).

Nor would I allow myself any time in the weight room at all, or the hair drying stage of my post-workout groomdown, or pretty much any leisurely approach to any part of the task at hand, which was to produce enough sweat to get a great shave. Man-breasts be damned -- I'm at peace with why I really come here, and no longer make any bones about it.

I do it for the shave.

Hard deadline looming, I hit the climbing machine and hit it hard, jammed the controls all the way up and pumped like a crazy idiot till the sweat was stinging my eyes and marinating my whiskers. Sweet, sweet marinade.

Ran down to the locker room, ran to the shower, ran around under the hot water, ran to the sink with my dop kit. I'd already injected a new Schick blade into my Injector, after the strangely ineffectual Feather blade experiment the day before, so I rushed through the unscrew cap squeeze off link of taylor avocado shaving cream into left hand then beat wet brush around till lather forms then paint face part and then I was ready to shave like the Flash.

I really don't care for these quickie shaves, to be honest. For starters, they remind me of how I used to shave during the decades+ that I was a jackass when it came to this stuff -- slashing a raspy disposable willy-nilly around my face, gashing it up pretty good, leaving it red and rawhidey everywhere, then stinging the bejesus out of myself with some alcohol-heavy Old Spice right on the fresh bloody skin.

But the main reason I don't enjoy these quickie shaves is that the shave is never that good when I rush it. Best-case it can be decent and presentable and all that, and it certainly looks better than if I didn't shave. But even with a foolproof razor like my trusty Merkur HD, my quickie shaves never reach that exalted, baby's butt smooth level where I fondle my face for the rest of the day and walk around whistling the Old Spice theme.

So it was with no small amount of resignation that I caught a quickie shave today with my Injector. Anything else and I would've taken my time, but if Promise Keepers says my little guy's doctor's appointment is more important than getting a perfect shave, then by gum, a mediocre rush-job it would be.

Swipe down relather swipe up and rinse. Apply Trumper Skin Food and --

What the?! I got a good shave! A damned good shave, in fact, in a little over a minute. This Injector is amazing. I used to haul ass with a Mach3, but my shaves never came within shouting distance of what I was able to get today, and I'd have nicks all over my face and neck besides.

I'm not saying I want to shave like this every day, or frankly, any day I don't absolutely have to. As pleasure-lite as a normal Injector shave can be, using it for a quickie shave very nearly reduces the fun count to zero.

That's the thing with the Injector. It's a razor for shavers, not shavegeeks. It does the job it's supposed to do and does it well, but there's something kind of joyless about the shave. It's efficient and easy and you don't really have to focus on what you're doing nearly to the degree you do with a DE or especially a straight razor, so you don't. The Injector shaves like a dream, but I can't help but feel that something important is missing from the experience I've come to look forward to ever since I discovered old-school wetshaving.

Maybe that's a good thing. In more lucid moments, I question whether men are supposed to get all hopped-up over the act of shaving facial hair. I shudder to think what Lee Marvin would think if he saw me dreamily whisking a Merkur over my chin, smiling a faraway smile and inhaling deeply that sweet Trumper's violet aroma. At the very least, I'd get kicked out of the SOLM.

At the very least, it's good to know I can haul ass with this Injector and still get a good shave. It's a credit to the razor and its no-nonsense WWII-era design. But is this how I really want to shave for the rest of my life? I went from mediocre, joyless shaves with the Mach3 to excellent, joyous shaves with the DE to excellent, joyless shaves with the Injector. This is a razor that was never meant to set shavegeeks' hearts a' flutter. Bottom line is, it's not as much fun as a DE, even though it can shave as well or better.

I began mulling on the drive to the doctor's, and the mull continues.

The Schick Injector seems to be in the shavegeek air again. Gordon, the eminence grise of Wetshavers, has been praising this unique safety razor (the first-ever safety razor, some say) on the shavegeek forums for quite some time, and now a few of us have finally gotten around to picking one up on eBay or from the lost and found box at a bus station and trying it, to great success.

I've been getting some really serious shaves from my WWII-era Eversharp Injector, so I was intrigued by a recent post on Wetshavers by a fellow wetshaver in the UK named Andy. Seems Andy noticed that the disposable Feather straight razor blades used in Feather's highly-regarded Artist Club cut throat happen to be the exact same size as an Injector blade, only a few millimeters longer.

So he snipped it down to size with a nail clipper, loaded the Feather blade into his latter-day Injector, and proceeded to get “the mother of all shaves”. Which is even more impressive when you take into account that Andy used the entry-level Pro Guard blade, which wraps the sharp edge in plastic guards to keep the actual edge itself from ever contacting the face as a “naked” blade does.

Now, I've made fun of some of the crackpot tweaks that burble up on the shavegeek boards from time to time, but this one sounded -- dare I say it? -- kosher like Leo Derocher.

So I took a fresh Feather Professional disposable straight razor blade and cut it down to size to match a Schick blade, and slid it into my Injector. It fit perfectly! Nice detective work, Andy.

Everything check out okay. It looked just like a standard blade from every angle, though I do admit some trepidation about using such a scary-sharp blade -- the sharpest I've encountered by far -- in a razor that was already a bit on the aggressive side compared with my usual Merkur DE. But I was so intrigued by Andy's experiment that I had to try it.

I went to the Y and sweated like a pig, then hit the showers and emerged excitedly to try this hybrid monstrosity. And hey, lo and behold, there was another guy, maybe in his 50s, catching a shave at a nearby sink with a disposable twin-blade and a can of foam! And nobody was giving him the stinkeye. I'm not saying I'm Rosa Parks, but, well, maybe I am saying that. Anyway, it was good to see the ice broken and the taboo of shaving at the Y lifted.

So I lathered up with Taylor avocado cream and a Vulfix #377 brush (hey, if I'm going to shave at the Y most days now, I'm going to use a He-Man brush, and to hell with babying it -- I threw it into my dop kit afterward without any case to store it -- enough with this fetishistic hothouse flower crap when it comes to brushes), and I went to town with my Feathered Injector.

Except it didn't shave any whiskers. At all.

What the? I relathered and shaved another with-grain pass like before, taking care to apply a modicum of pressure and tilt the razor in the same manner I usually do when it's loaded with a “real” Injector blade.

Still nothing. My face felt as stubbly as it was before I started.

It made no sense. Look, I've had laser eye surgery and have 20-15 vision, so when I say I eyeballed that razor and it and the Feather blade looked ready to rock, I'm saying it was thusly. The blade was positioned exactly where a normal Injector blade would be, the blade exposure was exactly the same as usual, but for some reason, nothing was happening.

So I yanked the Feather and jacked in a new Schick blade, and then relathered and shaved a third time. Mow city. A super close first pass, and then after a relather and second, against-grain shave, I had another one of those Bob Beamon glass-smooth shaves which I've come to expect from the amazing Injector.

I have no idea why such a great idea didn't work with my razor. I've emailed Andy to get his input -- maybe he can offer some input as to why I wasn't able to duplicate his success. Either way I'm stymied. I was certain that this setup would be a world-beater, but to not get any cutting at all? As Wally Shawn would say, it's inconceivable!

I'll get to the bottom of this. I'm sure I did something wrong. I had to. No other explanation for such a bizarre result. How could a blade which could inspire so much fear in a Feather straight razor fall so flat compared to a standard-issue Schick Injector blade? I hope to find out what bonehead mistake I made, because I really have high hopes for this idea.

Things went much, much better with the WWII-era Injector razor today. Not only did I force myself to adopt a lighter touch and try shaving more lightly on my face, but I went back to using a proper English shaving cream, Taylor's avocado. This made all the difference between yesterday's scraping and today's smooth, effortless cutting.

Yesterday's Injector shave with the QED anise/lavender shaving stick left my skin feeling raw and sensitive. These glycerin shaving soaps just don't work well with my skin, I'm afraid. Lots of guys seem to get good results with them, the QED soaps especially, but they don't lubricate and protect my skin nearly as well as a good English cream, or the best European creams like Proraso and Musgo Real.

Today I needed a shaving cream that was as thick, moisturizing, soothing, and protective as possible, so of course I turned to Taylor's avocado. The added avocado oil really seems to make for thicker, richer lather, and my skin feels so great after shaving with this stuff that I swear I'll never shave with anything else. Like Taylor's rose shaving cream, their avocado cream is just the thing for healing your face after beating it up with an overly aggressive shave the day before.

I shaved at the Y again today after working out, and between the Taylor avocado and backing off on the razor pressure, I got a shave that was at least the equal of my incredible Bob Beamon shaves last week at the Y with my Merkur HD safety razor. I got that elusive baby's butt smoothness on my cheeks, chin and neck, as well as that exfoliating tingle after the shave that says I just slathered Trumper's Skin Food on a freshly exposed layer of skin, and all this without a trace of irritation or redness.

Maybe I can live with this aggressive butterscotch-handled Injector after all -- as long as I use it with a thick English cream and a light touch.

Also, I think that the days of other members giving me the stinkeye when they see my shaving at the Y may be over. In the middle of my shave, two African-American guys who looked like they were linebackers for the Giants walked by the locker room sink where I was shaving and asked me about my Vulfix brush.

One of the guys said he had a boar's hair brush at home and it was starting to shed. I told him that I had a boar's brush too, but that I preferred a higher quality badger hair brush like the Vulfix I was using, and I told him he could get one Classic Shaving for as little as $60 that would compete favorably with any brush at any price. He couldn't believe how much lather my little Vulfix travel brush whipped up compared to his boar's hair brush at home, and said he was going to order one for himself.

The other guys who'd been standing at nearby sinks and giving me the stinkeye, all in their 50s and white as the driven snow, suddenly changed their tune when they saw the linebackers so into what I was doing. The stinkeyes disappeared, and for the first time, looks of near-acceptance came over their faces.

Hey, I'll take it.

Day Three of shaving with a vintage Eversharp/Schick Injector, and I'm starting to get a little raw.

My first two shaves with the Injector were monstrously good -- super close, very comfortable, and with zero irritation. In fact, the razor seems to toss out all the niggling little differences between shaving creams and pre-shave prep. Usually I can tell a significant difference between how my shaves feel when I use Taylor's rose cream versus Trumper's violet (the rose buffers and protects my skin a bit more than the Trumper, which tends to cut a little closer), but the Injector shaved exactly the same with both of them. The only difference was the scent. Other than that, the shave felt the same and cut the same. Weird. I even did the Nioxin hair conditioner pre-shave ritual before I shaved with the Taylor, but that didn't seem to matter either. With or without it, the Injector shaved me equally, superbly close.

So today I figured I'd go way off the reservation and try something totally different. I packed the Injector in my gym bag, and along with it, a new QED anise/lavender shaving stick Charles recently sent me. I'd never tried the anise/lavender shaving stick before, but it smelled so good I had to give it at least one go, so why not try it with the Injector? At the Y? After a workout? With lots of guys watching and frowning?

By the way, here's YMCA logic for you: It's okay to hog the machines which have big "Don't Hog The Machines" signs above each one, and it's also okay to not wipe your ass sweat off the seat when you finally finish your ten sets, yawn, stretch, scratch yourself absent-mindedly, and then slowly get up and let someone else catch a few reps. But it's not okay to shave at the sink in the locker room. No, that's just CRAZY.

Anyway, I sweated up a storm, grabbed a shower, and dumped my dop kit onto the counter by a sink. Popped the cap off the QED shaving stick and rubbed it all over my wet face till I smelled just like a mouthful of Good'n'Plenty, and then I raised the Injector to my face and went to town.

I've shaved with QED's glycerin-based soaps before, and I always found that they made my skin's surface "squeaky", so that even with a thick lather, the blade jumped and skipped when I guided it across my face. But for some reason, I didn't experience this at all with the Injector. It just shaved the same way it shaved with the Taylor and Trumper creams -- smoothly and steadily. In fact, it was the easiest shave I've ever had with the QED soaps.

Except for the fact that the shave was too close. Shaving with the QED soap didn't feel any different than when I used the English creams, but clearly this vintage Injector, with its deceptively aggressive blade exposure, needs a more cushiony lather than the QED's if it's not going to cut too close and cause some irritation.

Which it did. Though the shave was close and smooth, my face and neck felt a bit raw afterward. Gordon warned me that these really old Injectors with the bakelite handles and the olde-timey shave heads had more bite to them than the latter-day Injectors he swears by -- not having tried one, all I can say is that the 1940s Injector I have really sneaks up on you with its cutting. It feels smooth as hell while you're shaving, but clearly this thing is doing a serious job of mowing whatever happens into its thick, unyielding blade's path. It's got a much wider disconnect between how it feels on your face and how aggressive it actually shaves than any other razor I've tried, including the almighty Feather straight razor.

The QED shaving stick wasn't at fault -- it's just not the best partner to this particular razor and this particular face. I need a heavier, more cushioning cream if I want to use this Injector on a daily basis. And I do want to. I love this thing.

The thing to do now is to score a more modern Injector and see if its blade exposure is less aggressive, which might make it a better choice for regular use. I've found that while I can certainly catch a good onesie-twosie shave from very aggressive razors like Merkur's slant bar DE or one of the disposable-blade straight razors I have, I can't use them every day or they begin to beat up my skin. So far, the Merkur HD is the best day-to-day razor I've found, and it never gives me the slightest hint of trouble even as it shaves me down to the capillaries.

Problem is, these latter-day Injectors aren't very cool looking, are they? No offense to Gordon and his trusty mini windshield scraper, but I want my razor to look, well, bitchin'. I know I go on and on about how all I care about is the shave, and I don't care about the foppish rituals and embroidery, but dammit, I like looking at cool things. This vintage Injector I got is way cool -- looks like a Victorian-era sex toy, something to tickle m'lady with while you struggle with the 118 hook'n'loops on her bodice. The 1980s Injector, on the other hand, looks like something your dentist gives you to scrape your tongue with.

I'm sure it shaves like a dream -- hell, if Gordon says it does, then I know it does -- but I have to admit that the thought of waking up to this skinny tongue-scraper every morning doesn't thrill me as much as opening the medicine cabinet and seeing the gleaming chrome-plated Merkur HD, or this butterscotch-handled, gold-plated WWII-era Injector, or even the old Gillette adjustable DE.

Gordon's made of sterner stuff than I. He's moved beyond childish desire for shiny objects and reached that summit of purely pragmatic wetshaving I'm still gawking at from behind some binoculars. No wonder his big enthusiasms seem to center around brushes and creams -- he's got the razor part of the equation down, for life.

I felt that way when I'd run the gamut of razors at my disposal and settled on the Merkur HD as my shaving life partner, but then this Injector thing came up, and, well, now I'm confused. I love it, but it's so aggressive. If I can just change it somehow, it would be perfect and we'd be so happy together, I just know we would..

Someday I want to be able to open my medicine cabinet and find a box of futuristic wet-naps which wipe your whiskers away so quickly and thoroughly that "shaving", or whatever they used to call it back in the old days when they still used blades, takes less time and thought than Q-tipping your ears. Believe me, I want to get there. I don't want to have more crap in the bathroom than my wife does. I want to boil this obsession down to a generic-looking but highly effective razor, scent-free shaving cream, and a pleasureless applicator of some sort with a plain, drab appearance.

Then I'll be happy.